Buddhism

I've got a big lump on my head, my right foot has swollen up so much it looks like a rugby ball, the hernia in my groin has got bigger plus my lower back is acting up and I can hardly walk. My legs ache all over because I can only walk abnormally by putting weight where it shouldn't be going, but it doesn't matter one bit, because I've come to believe in the Four Noble Truths: 1: Life is suffering. 2: Suffering is caused by desire, or more precise the desire for private fulfillment or a selfish desire. 3: Suffering stops when selfish craving is overcome. 4: The way to overcome selfish craving is through the Eightfold Path prescribed by Siddhartha Gautama who is better known as Buddha.

If life is suffering, and I believe it is, then I can only be thankful for my lot. I'm suffering in a well heated apartment with a six pack of beer to ease my pains, and besides, nothing is permanent. All is change.

As for the world, it's changing too. All indications point to the fact that it's changing a hell of a lot faster than I can, as such, I've given up trying to keep up with changes in a world that is becoming to resemble a lunatic asylum.

Not knowing it, I've always been inclined to it. My life has always revolved around it even though I didn't know at the time what it was. My basic and very natural thinking finds reincarnation to be as acceptable as winter and summer. We come and go, and we go and come. Cause and effect, or what goes around comes around, makes sense, and I've always known that what I 'think' will have an influence on what happens to me.

All I know for sure is that I don't know much of anything, but I have to admit that I agree with Siddhartha about the first noble truth: life is suffering; and to overcoming the suffering, ones must do it on ones own. To do so takes courage, and Christianity, according to some, finds courage to be the first virtue. It takes courage to make the leap of faith, but I cannot find the courage to do such a thing. I need something completely different. Jumping off a cliff does not appeal to me, angels are kind of questionable, and the preachers of Christianity are not inspiring any faith in me.

I would rather row across a river with a life vest. I'm looking at a boat, and it looks like it's sound. The other shore is far away, but this land, the land of my birth, has driven me to this boat. I'm looking back at the world in amazement. I still can't make head nor tail of it. It's time to go. I have no choice.

The old man is waiting in the boat; oars at the ready. His face is serene. His eyes are gleaming.

I look back once again, and I don't turn to stone.

Waltre